With the alarming amount of violent attacks against women in South Africa, we were startled by the results of an IPSOS survey which illustrates just how much patriarchy still shapes the minds, attitudes and behaviours of people regarding women abuse. 

In face-to-face interviews with 3 600 people across the country, the survey found that at least one in every 10 South Africans believe men have the right to physically attack their partners or wives.

Around 60% of the people also believed a woman should obey her husband or partner. Paternalism is a fundamental fixture of any patriarchal society and IPSOS says the findings reveal that a deep-seated paternalism exists in our society as well as conservative views which define a woman as a possession, rather than an individual, in her own right.

Patriarchy is so embedded in our society and daily lives that it shows up in casual ways. We almost become accepting of it – that includes both men and women. But together, by actively calling it out, we can recognise it and start to break down the control it has over us as society.

Co-founder and former Executive Director of Sonke Gender Justice Dean Peacock, explains how it is vitally important that men step forward and make their voices heard. In particular, they need to hold other men accountable for any violence against women or when upholding patriarchy and inequality. Men should also use their sphere of influence on gender issues, whether that is in the workplace, their communities or religious centres.

His top tips for men to fight gender equality and turn the tide on patriarchy:

• Get to root the causes. Growing up surrounded by violence, we need to be aware of what impact this can have on us as men and how it makes us behave towards women. I myself had also been assaulted a number of times and was trying to understand the impact of that violence on me. With hindsight those were important factors in my decision to do work to address men’s violence.
• Be role models. We all remember in our childhood the men who did things differently, who didn’t reproduce patriarchal practices at home, and lived their lives differently. Many of us drew inspiration from those men and we need to reflect those examples to the next generation of men.
• Hold other men accountable and speak out against bad behaviour. A key piece of Sonke’s work has been to hold male politicians and men in positions of public leadership, men in high profile public positions, whether it’s in government or private sector or the religious sector, accountable. Then of course we do lots of work to educate men in local communities on women’s rights and the impact and extent of gender-based violence at the community level.
• Become an activist. Get support from the government, the community, your company, and religious leaders by educating them on the factors which cause gender based violence. But to do this effectively, you need to educate yourself. Visit the Sonke Gender Justice website or give us a call to see how you can get involved.

Why we also think the IPSOS findings are so interesting, and relevant, is because it illustrates that women are also succumbing to patriarchy, and might not even realise it. After all, more women agreed with the findings than men. 1st for Women believes that women should also ensure they are not discriminating against one another. 1st for Women’s top tips to support each other:

• Criticising women because of the way they dress, who her partner is, their appearance or weight and being called bossy at work.
• Seeing each other as rivals and undermining one another, especially when it comes to the way we look.
• Being unaccepting of men who display emotional behaviour such as vulnerability.
• Judging women and their life choices.

The IPSOS survey shows us that there were high levels of agreement that physical abuse is acceptable and still exists. It also provides further insight into why violence against women is so high. While the government has made some decisive noise on how it plans to address the issue of violence against women across the broader society, as men and women, we can also start with some of the smaller steps to break down patriarchy.